hurdles and obstacles that come our way, the irritations that life
throws at us. It may be the lousy weather or the volume of traffic.
And what about our children? How many of them actually say 'please' or
'thank you' or appreciate what they have in life, like the opportunity
for an education or the meal that is provided for them each evening.
Should we be grateful? Does gratitude have a role in modern life or
should we simply accept this as how it is?
So often we're racing from one task to the next, stopping without a
second thought about what we're doing. We race round the supermarket
or go online and order our regular grocery shop, we jump into the car,
stopping to fill it with petrol on the way to our next appointment or
perhaps complain about the length of time our decorators are taking to
finish their work. That last one, by the way, was me, feeling stressed
at how long my house was being inconvenienced, until I came to my
senses and realised how fortunate I was to have a home and be able to
hire decorators!
But this mindset prompted me to question how often we feel grateful
for what we have and to consider if it's relevant or even important to
feel gratitude in these modern times. It seems to be relatively easy
for us to take things for granted and not appreciate our good fortune.
After all, we live in a buy now pay later society where so many of us
have access to a great many things. Do we actually need to be thankful
for it all?
Many of us work hard, why shouldn't we have what we want! But lots of
people work long hours, sometimes in back-breaking conditions for
little or virtually no reward. Yes, it's reasonable that those who can
should enjoy the money they earn, but let's not forget those less
fortunate, let's remember not to take things for granted. Sometimes
even setbacks and disappointment can bring valuable experiences. They
can provide significant life lessons that we eventually end up being
appreciative of.
Gratitude is important inasmuch as it stops us from being superficial
and continually wanting more, constantly seeking the next fix.
Mindfully spending money, buying things, treating ourselves from time
to time, sharing our homes, food and good fortune with friends and
family are all part of investing in, fully utilising and appreciating
what we have. Being present in the moment and pausing to really value
and enjoy our good fortune enables the experience to be all the more
meaningful and satisfying.
Often the significant memories in life are those that came for free,
where we enjoyed a day in the park, the countryside or on the beach,
playing and enjoying the colours, sounds and smells of nature. Be
grateful that we're able to go for a walk, climb trees, go bird
watching or fishing.
An attitude of gratitude provides the opportunity to be reflective and
sensitive to others too. When we take time to consider our life
through their eyes it can provide valuable insights. Equally, seeing
what others are happy and grateful for can highlight what is
important, the things that money can't buy. Good health, loving
relationships, a safe home, work that we find satisfying, stimulating
and rewarding are things that money can't necessarily buy and yet are
the most important things in life to be grateful for.
Being grateful includes good manners. Saying 'thank you' demonstrates
respect and can mean the world to the recipient. When someone does
something thoughtful for us a simple 'thank you' acknowledges that
we've noticed and appreciate it. Only they know how much effort it
took, even though it may seem relatively minor to us. Saying 'thanks'
enables them to feel valued.
Being grateful does not mean being a pushover and accepting repeatedly
poor service or forgoing our own needs. But it can mean that we revise
our perspective on life. If a restaurant has run out of our favourite
dish, rather than be outraged let's appreciate the other choices and
be grateful for the opportunity to try something new. If we have to
queue for a while let's treat ourselves to a few moments quiet time.
Use the opportunity to stop and feel grateful that we're safe and in
such a fortunate position.
So, next time you're feeling aggrieved that they've run out of 'your'
bread or that you're having to wait to pick up the latest model of
phone just stop and consider the importance of gratitude, remember how
good it is to be healthy, well and fortunate enough to be in your
position.
Susan Leigh is a Counsellor and Hypnotherapist who works with stressed
individuals to promote confidence and self belief, with couples
experiencing relationship difficulties to improve communications and
understanding and with business clients to support the health and
motivation levels of individuals and teams.
For more articles, information or to make contact please visit
http://www.lifestyletherapy.net
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